First of all let’s just settle the matter of why we share a bed.
There’s plenty of anecdotal evidence pointing to a large percentage of couples (up to 25% in some studies) who opt to sleep in different beds and, let’s face it, the film and television industry has made a whole heap of bucks out of the comedy routine of blanket-stealers, snorers and sleep-talkers. Then there’s the heavy-turners, night owls versus early-sleepers and the simple fact that some like it hot while others prefer the windows flung open and to be wrapped in only a sheet. It looks like a no-brainer: we’re often just not cut out to sleep together.
But there’s also a great deal of research which shows that couples who sleep together and happier and healthier.
- According to researchers in the University of Pittsburgh, couples who sleep together have lower levels of the stress hormone cortisol, which is linked to heart disease, depression and auto-immune disorder.
- Research revealed at the Edinburgh International Science Festival this year found 94% of couples who were in contact with each other while they slept were satisfied with their relationship compared with only 68% of couples who slept apart. There was even a difference between those who slept facing each other and those who “spooned” or slept back-to-back. The study found 86% of couples who slept closer than an inch apart were happy compared to 66% of couples who slept more than 30 inches apart.
So, if we’re sure we’re happier and healthier if we’re in the same bed, how do you cope with all that tossing and turning?
- Find a bed which is sprung so that movements on one side don’t effect the other. Bedpost has plenty of makes and models which make this claim so go in store to “test-drive” one – and don’t forget to take your partner.
- Respect each other’s bedtimes. That doesn’t mean going to bed at different times, but if you’re a nightowl and your partner needs to get up early in the morning, why not go to bed with them until they fall asleep and then get up – you can always lie in in the morning. (Just remember to tip-toe when you get back into bed.)
- Try having separate blankets on each side of the bed. This means your partner won’t steal yours and also lets you both have the level of warmth which suits each of you.
